i'm left without a choice,

[NICOLETTE VALERIE CHANEL]

WE HAD A GOOD RUN
EVEN I HAVE TO ADMIT

- - - - -



nicolette valerie chanel

[/i][/font][/size][/center]

"i can't find the words to explain"
"just how much you make me go insane"

[/center][/blockquote]

*

[/font][/size]my name is tess. i've been role playing for two years. everyone knows i'm a bitching vag. this world has had my footprints stamped all over it for fourteen years. you know my oh so famous characters cristabella swann, logan pribbles, lex edmonton, and josephine victoria[/center][/blockquote][/blockquote]

WE DIDN'T COME TO COMPETE
THIS IS A DEMONSTRATION

- - - - -

NAME: nicolette valerie chanel
NICKNAME: nicky, nicks, nicotine, bug
GENDER: femme
AGE AND DATE OF BIRTH: nineteen, october 10
SEXUALITY: heterosexual
STATUS: single
RELIGION: it doesn't really matter to her. belief is belief. have faith in whatever you want as long as it makes you happy.
YEAR: freshman
MAJOR: music and photography
PB: impossibleperfection from deviantart

KICK DRUM BEAT IN MY CHEST AGAIN
WE WILL NEVER BELIEVE AGAIN

- - - - -

NICKY LIKES:

frozen ice; babies; animals; neon colours; big cities; bright colours; songs; guitars; pianos; music; her ipod; the smell of fresh grass; the smell of fresh laundry; the smell of gas; teddy bears; weddings; couples; birds; parks; trees; ponds; art; large headphones; parties; fashion shows; hats; victorian houses; blue curtains; mosaic pieces; all people; gyms; kiwi; type writers; bands; concerts; traveling; foreign places; pizza; old time movies; shoes; clothes; skinny jeans; bright shoes; bright jackets; coloured cars; vintage music; loud sounds; chinese and japanese food; culture; learning; school; books; large glasses; old people; feather pillows; hotel rooms; hotel soaps; hotel chocolates; laundry mats; funny people; people with musician hands; large play toys; little trinkets; gifts; nature channels; birthdays; anniversaries; romance novels; romance movies; comedies; french music; amusement parks; bookstores; crowded places; coffee; chocolates; candy shops; large shopping malls; large libraries; wise people; stories; movies; going out; sunlight; warmth; snow; rain; puddles; rainy days in; pennies; dimes; graham crackers; silky clothes; sunhats; beaches; sand; skittles; cinnamon spices; kitchens; restaurants; fluffy towels; rubber ducks; lingerie; dark hair; bright eyes; classic rocks; jazz music; old time music; large fields; open areas; trees; ponds; waves; kites; baby channels; doctor channels; cartoons; soap operas; talking; cellphones; accents; strange looking people; confusing puzzles; knitting; sewing; bubble baths; scented candles; little bugs; flowers; sunflowers; bridal magazines; fashion magazines

NICKY DISLIKES:

fighting; spiders; knives; nightmares; cotton clothing; sweaty days; crying; brain freezes; open waters; guns; war; mint chocolate; smelly candles; tiny beds; flat sheets; big dogs; horror movies; rich, snobby, people; muscular guys; exercising in a gym; confusing puzzles; unable to read music; unable to understand someone; mocking; teasing; bullying; sex toys; dirty scum; rust; moldy food; apricots; airports; airplanes; being sea sick; unhappy endings; pity; black licorice; walking around with no panties; not having a matching bra and panties; cold water; being late; being yelled at; divorce; split ends; dry skin; mangoes; humid, damp places; geese; belly button lint; gloomy people; dirty skin; dirty fingernails; badly tuned pianos; creaky floors; hot cement; sad days; being unhappy; scary endings; scary people; dark places; lazy people; rumors; rap music; frills; sausage; hurt feelings; barbara walters; morning shows; infomercials; ugly cars; dark colours; violent people; violent movies; therapists; bananas; big breasts; skimpy dresses; having no friends; being rejected; being hurt; glue sticks; expensive things; rude people; wilting flowers; smelly flowers; tight corsets; smoking; cigar smells; sports; having weak ankles; slutty girls; being too sensitive; nagging people; demanding people; small screens; bad movies; making out noises

PERSONALITY:

• Bubbly&&Optimistic

Nics is what everyone sees as hopeless optimistic. There's always going to be a better tomorrow. Keep your chin up, someone cares about you. That type of person that never sees that bad and can only see the good. It's like her eye sight is tuned in on the better of all reality. It's a rare sight when you can come across Nicolette without a smile or a laugh on her face. She hates to see other people sad, and hates to see herself sad so she always does things to keep herself happy. She'll sit and colour in colouring books if she has to. She'll sit in front of a mirror and talk to herself, telling herself positive things or just having a conversation with herself period. Whatever it takes to put herself in a better mood, and normally, she does keep herself in a fairly happy mood even though she has a brain tumor pressing in on her brain and will soon take her vision and before long her life. There's always an upside to that, right?

• Carefree&&Passionate

Growing up, home to home, Nicolette picked up various traits from different households. Some families taught her to show compassion toward the less fortunate, then shipped her back to the orphanage. Some familes taught her to look deeper for the inner music, then shipped her back to the orphanage. Some families sat her on a piano bench and told her to play what she could hear, then shipped her back to the orphanage. All these people, all these people made Nicolette passionate about life in the fields where they were passionate about it. They were passionate about their marriage, they were passionate about music or art, they were passionate about helping others. All these rolled into her personality and taught her how to be passionate herself. It taught her how to be calm, kind, and well behaved. To look upon others how they look upon you. So, when she looks at others she likes to see kindness, and happiness, even when it's not there. She likes to see somewhere deep down inside a cruel heart that there is compassion for other. She's completely and utterly, metaphorically speaking, blind.

• Childlike&&Innocent

People don't get hurt in Nicolette's world. They just get sad for a little while before a lollipop can cheer them up. Her mind functions in the ways a five-year-old's would. Playing, laughing, singing along. It's all the things a person needs in the world. They don't need money, or expensive cars. They need crayons, and coloured chalk to play hopscotch with. People try to be realistic with her but she complete does a 360 on them and turns the situation around into a happy one. Your dog died? At least he doesn't have to worry about fleas anymore. She tells herself that the world is so much better than what people give it credit for when really, she doesn't want to have to face the truth. Because facing the truth can lead to unhappiness and no more laughter. No more smiles or colouring books. Just sadness. Maybe it's about time someone gave her a slap in her innocent little face and show her the real world in it's finest.

• Shy&&Sensitive

As charming as Nics may be, it takes some time to pry that side of her open. She's not one to just go chatchatchat right away when she meets someone knew. She's extremely shy around new and unfamiliar faces. Most of the time she gives them a friendly smile, a nice solid handshake and waits for them to break the ice because she's stupid to how to do it. Being so shy makes her extremely sensitive on the inside. She's the softest girl you'll ever meet, and I'm not just talking skin wise. Anything can trigger her emotions. She could see a dead bird and start to feel overwhelmed at the thought that it might not have gotten to live for very long. A little bug that's lost an antenna, well, that just deserves a sobbing heart and a good hug session. Someone could loose a grandparent, someone she didn't even know and she'd show up crying at the funeral for them, sad about the death. Whether people like it or not, Nicolette cares.

• Romantic&&Desperate

Dying; Nicolette is dying and in this time of dying she's never found a more strong need to find someone to hold her hand in that hospital bed. She's desperate to find someone to keep her fighting, to give her a reason to keep on pushing against this brain tumor until it goes away. There's such a thing as 'true love' in her eyes. There's such a thing as 'love at first sight.' She sees couples and she coos at them and instantly wants to ask them how they did it. How they fell in love with each other and how they knew it happened. They see babies and they ask how it felt to by this man's mother of his child. She wants to be able to feel these feelings that these people tell her about. She sees an elderly couple and she asks for advice on relationships. Her eyes are peeled right open for a potential someone out there. Someone that can show her what it feels like to be wanted and loved deeply for. She just wants that before she dies.

SECRETS:

FEARS:

GOALS:

I CAN MAKE YOUR HEART SLOW
I CAN FEEL THE WEATHER IN MY BONES

- - - - -

MOTHER'S NAME: margo vanessa morel
MOTHER'S OCCUPATION: unknown
FATHER'S NAME: unknown
FATHER'S OCCUPATION: unknown
SIBLINGS: unknown
EXTENDED FAMILY:
emily savannah chanel, adopted mother, twenty-nine
NATIONALITY: french, dutch, swedish, russian
HOMETOWN: paris, france
CURRENT RESIDENCE: new york, new york
BEST MEMORY:

"Besides coming to America would be when my friend, Emily, adopted me. I was sixteen when she officially adopted me as her own. She had been my foster mother for a little bit, but she got attached to me and I guess wanted me to be part of her family. She's more like my sister than she is my mother, and I appreciate that. She's still family. It was the most exciting day of my life to be a 'Chanel.' I felt like i belong somewhere. Everyone wants to feel like they belong somewhere and Emily helped make me feel like I did. I still go back to her apartment every now and then, just to hang out with her and talk. She's letting me spread my wings but keeping close by me."

WORST MEMORY:

"I don't exactly remember it too well. It all kind of happened in a blurr. My mother, she was carrying me through the rain. She carried me up some stairs, knocked on a door and told me to stay before she went running. I listened, thinking she was going to be coming back before a big, black woman opened the door and saw me in. That was my first orphanage home. That wasn't the worst memory though, that's just the beginning of it. The worst part was finding a family, I was five, and I thought it was really working out. They loved on me and treated me great. Then my adopted mother got pregnant, and they didn't want me anymore. They didn't need me, I guess. They had a baby of their own on the way so they didn't need someone that's not related to them anymore. My first family rejection, that's my worst memory. So I went back to the orphanage. I came and went, new families almost every year and for some reason or another they didn't stick. Those are my worst memories."

HISTORY:

THE BEGINNING
- - - - -

There once was this girl. This girl had beautiful eyes. This girl had beautiful hair. This girl had a beautiful body. This girl's beauty attracted a man. The man and the girl fell in love. But as quickly as two people fall in love, fall into a place of faerie tale happiness, they fell quickly out of love. It was really just a fling, a deep fling that lasted longer than it should and ended up hurting more than one person in the end. The girl lost her beautiful body when she became pregnant. In October, she had a baby girl. The baby girl's father left long before she was born and left the girl to become a woman all on her own. This baby girl had beautiful eyes. This baby girl had beautiful hair. This baby girl had a beautiful smile. "My mamma loved me." The baby girl said. "She used to let me dress up in her clothes when I was three. I'd wear a long dress that covered over my feet and big shoes that flopped around when I walked. She let me wear her make up and used to tell me I was the next Marilyn Monroe." The mother grew tired. The woman lost the beauty in her eyes. The woman lost the gleam in her hair. The woman lost the figure of her body. Everyday, the woman saw her baby girl grow into her, beautiful and happy and the woman was jealous. "She wouldn't speak to me some days." Those days, those days were the dark days of the woman. She'd lock herself in her bedroom for hours, refusing to look at the girl that she held so much resent for. The baby girl would have to feed herself, eating cereal out of the box with a side of bread. "But she loved me. As much as people say she didn't, she did. She did what was best for me." The jealousy grew to the point where the woman scooped up her baby girl, carrying her across the streets of Paris in the rain. "She told me, 'Stay here, bug. I'll be right back.'" Standing on the porch, the woman knocked on the door and ran back down the wet stairs. The baby girl stood there, staring out into the rain, shivering with her tiny frame, blue eyes wide and blond hair wet and dripping. For a moment, she thought she saw her mother hiding behind a car and almost ran out to follow but the door opened. A large black woman, big boned and big framed, stood in the doorway. Her face was worn, tired, but kind. She didn't say a word but instead took the baby girl into the house. The baby girl was bathed, clothed, fed, and given a bed. This was the start of the journey for a girl becoming a woman. This was the beginning of the path of a child finding where they belong. It was long, hard, and had much despair but that's what made her a human.

- - - - -

As a toddler, Nicolette was loved by most of the adults that came in to foster a child or adopt one. "I remember the table." They would come into the room. "It was a long table with four chairs. One for me, two for the foster-parents-in-question and one for Rosette, the orphanage keeper." The potential foster parents would sit there in their seats and ask the child questions. As if interrogating them and see if they're the right piece of meat that they want for their family. "My first family, I'll never forget. I was five and it was the summer time when they took me to their big house by the lake. They were an older couple, maybe late thirties and early forties and my foster mother wanted a child so bad because she couldn't have one of her own." Later they found out, oh, she could have a baby of their own, and when she found out she was pregnant "They sent me back." You have to realize how traumatic that is for a five-year-old to go through. You've been ditched by your mother and then taken in by someone else only to be ditched by them again. "My second family, the woman had me as a surprise for her husband. He came home, saw me, freaked out and they took me back. I think they're divorced now." One new family each year, when she was seven she got three new families. All of which found a reason to take her back, never to see her again because they didn't need her. They taught her along the way. One couple, reluctant to give her up because they were being arrested for growing pot, taught her the ways of music and ever since she's been in love. "Norm, that was the man's name, he taught me how to play the guitar. I was seven and he was proud that I could catch on so easily. Jillian, the woman, taught me how to play the piano at the same time and I fell in love with it. They were both such kind people that did the best for me." She was ten when she was fostered by a woman with three other kids, two being twin babies whom the woman made Nicolette take care of. "She was a beastly woman. I'm glad she took me back." By the age of ten, Nicolette had had twelve different families and been returned twelve different times. It was like she was a broken toy at Wal-Mart, that you could just keep taking back over and over again. Here's your money back, sorry for the trouble this toy has given you.

"When I was fourteen, I got my home with the first boy I ever liked. His name was Caleb and he was a year older than me." This family was one of the longest to have her. They would have kept her if it weren't for the fact Caleb got some foreign girl pregnant and they had to trade out Nicolette for the girl and Caleb's baby. Before Caleb decided to knock someone up, he decided to prepare himself with Nicolette for the experience. "It was a hot summer day in the attic, and we were playing a game. The game led to shedding of clothes, before kissing, then touching, then we were on this springy cot." To her, she thought it promised them forever. Because if someone sleeps with you, they love you right? "Wrong. I found that out the hard way. Caleb was my first fling, my first love, and my first heartbreak. All in that order." Back to the orphanage Nicolette was sent before orders for children started to come from America. "I was fifteen when I got the call." It wasn't important to her at first. Parents saw her as less appealing because she was older than the adorable toddlers. It was harder to get a home and she was sure that these parents were going to send her back anyway. Then she was shipped off to New York and to a big penthouse apartment in the uptown of the city. There standing in a doorway was an unphased young woman, in her early twenties. She saw Nicolette and offered her in. "Emily didn't seem to like me that much, saying that her friend said it would be a good experience for her. She apologized for her mood though, saying she just had to give up a foster baby to it's new home. Emily was all into watching babies and toddlers, not so much teenagers. I was somewhat a surprise to her." She boarded her, fed her, and made sure she had a nice place to sleep and over time, Emily and Nicolette grew keen to each other. After a few fights, most of them ending in screaming foreign words at each other, they grew on each other and became more like sisters. "For my sixteenth birthday, I got a family. I became a Chanel and Emily adopted me." This was the beginning of a good life, Nicolette thought. It was the beginning of something other than being put in and out of new homes with new families and new reasons to be sent back. This gave her a cause to keep smiling and keep hoping for the better of people.

Nicolette was enrolled in a private high school. This was her start for the rest of her life. At first, people didn't take too well to the "foreign" kid. That's because she was weird and could pass her French class with ease. Then people began to see her as someone more than just a plastic face adopted by some rich woman. The school saw her potential in music academics, playing the piano and the guitar with ease and fairly well. The other girls, as in the popular ones, still weren't too keen on this new girl walking into their territory with her French words and bubbly personality that seemed to draw their males attention away. Even when they got one of their sport jocks to film him having sex with Nicolette and the video was posted up everywhere on the Internet, Nicolette didn't let it get to her. They would tease her, make fun of her and she would just laugh and smile along with it like it was funny. Funny of how stupid she was to ride such a little dick. This rebellious attitude just seemed to make her more and more popular among the students and in the end, the girls had to give up trying to be her enemy and give in to trying to be her friends. At graduation, Nicolette was pleased to find out she'd be going to college on a music scholarship to any college of her choice. She wanted to stay close to her first home though, close to Emily so they could keep in contact without being miles apart and many dollars worth of long distance phone calls. She chose to stay in New York and take up her scholarship in music there and find new friends while the rest went off to Brown, Yale, Harvard, or the community college down the streets, the one in front of the homeless shelter where all the homeless men wander around asking for money or to have sex with them. Yes, to have sex on their dirty, pee smelling dicks. Nicolette avoids going close to there. Too many greasy old men hobbling around.

Happy endings were cut short. Nicolette got very sick one day and Emily took her to the hospital. That's where, after multiple scans over her whole body and finding out she was healthy as healthy can be. Then they did one last scan and found a small tumor wedged between her right side of the brain and her left side of the brain. It could have been operated on, easily removed without a problem if it weren't for the fact it was wedged right in between the brain. Doctors have a surgery they can do, and they have a treatment plan they can follow to make her fit as a fiddle. It's just if she wants it. At this point, she could either be a vegetable, or die, or attempt to get better with a possible chance of dying. She decided to go with the treatment plan. She doesn't like anyone to know about the tumor. It makes them sad for some reason. They give her pity about it and pat her back like it will go away just like that. Every three weeks, she sneaks into the hospital and takes her medicine and goes out to live like a normal college student. A college student that could possibly start to seize in class before face planting against the table and dying. But, you know how the story goes.

BABY YOU'RE A CLASSIC
LIKE A LITTLE BLACK DRESS

- - - - -

ROLE PLAY WORD: --

go get your own