- - paralyzed thump;

[steph]

SO IT SEEMED only normal that the ferris wheel would be turning, despite the fact it was pouring outside. Okay, not so normal. hat seemed pretty okay with Zuly, though, as she sat in the compartment looking out at the view, the rain distorting it. She was coming back down to the bottom. She liked it better at the top even if she could barely see outside. Just the notion that maybe some freak accident would happen, like some loose nut or cable makes the ferris wheel come crumbling down and she was at the top. But, as many many people would say- God forbid something like that ever happened. Well, to be honest, the only reason Zuleika wouldn't want it to happen was because there were other people on the feris wheel besides herself. Having them die because of her sudden fetish for freak accident scenarios wasn't exactly fair now was it?

Anyways, the real reason she even bothered coming here in such crappy weather was because, for the first time in a really long time, Zuleika Mejias was just in the mood to sit back, relax, and watch the daisies grow. This, ladies and gentlemen, only happens once in a blue, purple, green, or periwinkle moon. Yes. Periwinkle. Let's add tickle-me-pink in there too while we're at it. So you get the gist. She wore nothing special, just an outfit she would normally wear. She had on a white guinea tee, some jean shorts with a brown belt, black pumps, and an opened button up gray sweater on top of it all. Her dark locks were up in a messy yet stylish bun. This was how she normally looked: like she just rolled out of bed and put on whatever she could get her hands on.

The twenty year old crossed one long, tanned smooth leg over the other and sighed deeply as her cell phone started ringing. Thriller by Michael Jackson started blaring and for a second, Zul was bobbing her head slightly and singing along with it before the song finished and she clicked the button to see the text message. She already knew who it was from. Only one person in her entire phonebook had that ringtone...

Ford.

And as she read the text, even though it was something so simple and silly, she couldn't help but smile. She chuckled slightly and shook her head a little before replying back, her nails painted a deep maroon color as they hits the keys mutedly on her Voyager. He had asked her what she was up to and explained that he really didn't want to go to his statistics class so she should entertain him for the time being. It was funny, how close she had grown to Ford. She didn't expect to ever really get close to anyone in general...And though she never told Ford her past or anything involving it, she knew it was better not to. He had so much going on...She couldn't put her problems on him. If anything, she knew she should be helping him through this. He didn't need alcohol, he just needed someone to shut up and listen to him.

A few dark strands fell into her face as she glanced through her photos. They were all so childish, while some made it obvious that they were no longer kids. They were young adults. Like the ones with them drinking at parties, dancing like they were having sex on hardwood, laughing with that dazed look like they didn't know what was going on. But then there were some were they were at a carnival sitting n a bench eating cotton candy to even a random picture of them two having fallen asleep on his bed in his dorm, the controllers from the Playstation 3 at the bottom of the bed by their feet from playing all night. It was silly to think any of that was more than a friendly relationship.

Committment wasn't her thing anyways.

And as the man controlling the ferris wheel opened the door to her compartment, she glanced up to see the very person she was just thinking of. Sure, she told him to meet her there, but she didn't think he would arrive so quickly, unless he already figured she would be here...

She smiled, flashing her pearly white teeth and then chuckled, "Took ya' long enough," she stuck out her pierced tongue at him before moving slightly closer to the window so he could fit either across from her or next to her, whicever he preferred.

OUTFIT: click me!
TAGGED: ford martin lee

[FORD MARTIN LEE]

- - - - - - - - - -

He was stuck at school. His parents always expected him to pass, even with the problems in his life. They wanted him to be successful, make something of himself, do something with himself, just like his father. They wanted him to major in something medical-related - he's majoring in photography, something that he loves. Sure he loved his family, but he didn't want to grow up like his father; never home, always stressed. Ah, the life of a surgeon. Being the youngest, especially since Toby didn't follow in their father's footsteps, he was expected to; he never told his parents about his major choice, and he never would until he graduated college, if he graduated. The alcohol was getting in the way of his studies, he couldn't even stay awake in class anymore, let alone finish the simplest assignments.

His head was down on his desk, his essay under his head. The professor was in front of the class, lecturing about some stuff that he didn't care about. As he sat there, many different thoughts processed through his head; the accident, his friends, the funerals, their families, Zuly. Slowly he drifted into sleep and woke up about thirty minutes later with the professor hovering over him and his essay covered in drool. Shit... He sat up and smiled awkwardly at his professor, who did not have the nicest look on her face. "You'll still accept it, right?" She rolled her eyes and walked back to the front to continue her hour long lecture about whatever.

Sighing lightly, he pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, trying to keep it hidden in his lap, and he sent a quick message to Zuly. By the time she replied, class was over. He didn't want to be there anymore, and he knew Zuly wasn't at school, but he knew where she was. Before he walked out of the room, he placed his drool-covered essay on the professor's desk without her noticing and rushed out of the room. If Zuly wasn't at the college, she had to be at the ferris wheel, since that seemed to be one of her favorite places to go. He had no idea why, but he loved it too, just because he loved to look at the sights that you could see while you were at the very top.

He walked as fast as he could to his car, a 1969 Camaro SS. He took pride in his car, even if his father did buy it for him; it was his baby, his life, and he took damn good care of it. As he slid into the driver's side, he tightly gripped the steering wheel in his hands and then started it, pulling out of the student parking lot and making his way to the ferris wheel where Zuly was sure to be.

Ford wasn't the kind of guy that was really into commitment, but after meeting Zuly, he knew she was the one for him. Sure it may sound corny, but the way they got a long, all the fun times they had together, and the way she treated him. She listened to him and tried to help him as much as possible, and because of her, he's been trying to kick the habit of drinking himself to death. All in all, you could say he loved her, though he didn't know if the feelings were returned since they seemed more like family than lovers.

He didn't realize it was raining until he was almost at the ferris wheel; how something like that could get past him, he didn't know, but he did enjoy the rain more than the sun. He parked his car far away from anybody else, you know, just in case some jerk decides to swing their door open and hit his baby. He stepped out of his car, locking as quickly as possible and ran most of the way to the ferris wheel, hoping he wasn't soaked by the time he got there. His phone vibrated and he reached into his pocket and pulled it out, covering it from the rain with his hand. The text was from Zuly, telling him to meet her at the ferris wheel. He knew her too well.

He made it just in time, the ferris wheel came to a stop and he rushed to it, standing by the man as he opened the door to one of the compartments. Lucky for him, it was Zuly's. He smiled and pushed his way in, taking a seat in front of her and laughed as she stuck her tongue out at him.

"You couldn't have picked a better day, huh?"

- - - - - - - - - -

status done
outfit !!
music simon and garfunkel - mrs. robinson

[steph]

THE SOBER SMILES from Ford were always better than the drunk ones, even though she knew that she, deep down, loved both either way. She did not like seeing him as a wreck, since she always had this doubt that, one day, she would end up seeing him, not passed out in the back of his car as she drove him back to his dorm or her apartment, but instead in a coffin from drinking himself to death. Zuleika, quite honestly, did not think she would be able to handle something like that - not again. She watched her mother die, she didn't want to watch the only other person she ever truly cared about die as well. Still, she knew that with every drink he had, he was just killing himself a little more each day.

In a way, though, she felt like a hypocrite whenever she told him everything would be alright and that he always had her shoulder to lean on. She, herself, didn't feel like everything would be alright-but when she thought about that, she meant her own life, not his. Zuleika was a fugitive. She was an illegal immigrant claiming she was here just to study anthropology, but did not plan on staying there. That was the truth, until she met Ford.

She chuckled as the door was closed and the ferris wheel started moving again, "Actually I could have," she smirked playfully before laughing softly, "If it was sunny and actually hot out we could have gone cliff diving..." She had only taken Ford once, and he had looked at her like she had five million heads. It actually made her laugh, considering she didn't get what the big deal was. She ended up jumping off the cliff right in front of him and he looked ready to grab her and drag her back but had stopped himself when he came close to the edge since she had already jumped off and was screaming and laughing as she did before plummetting down into the ocean.

It had been hot back then, and they had gone to Spain since her friend, the same one that introduced her to it, bought her plane tickets since they hadn't seen each other in a while and a reunion was in order. She remembered how pale Ford had gotten when he had raced to the bottom of the cliff and stood on shore in his swim trunks looking like he saw a ghost and worry all over his face as Zuleika got out of the water laughing with two other people. He looked pissed to be honest, even after Zuleika explained to him over and over again that she was fine...Back then, she didn't understand why he had gotten so mad at her and why he had been so pale when she was standing right in front of him in one peice...

But now, looking back on it, she knew why... because now she felt that way everytime he passed out from drinking too much. She would go pale and fear would hit her so strongly she felt like something was choking back her scream of fear that maybe he wouldn't wake up again. She would always end up staying up that entire night, just to make sure he was breathing. Maybe that was how he felt the day she jumped off that cliff. It could have killed her. Everytime she did those crazy stunts, she risked her life. And yet she laughed it off like it wasn't a big deal. To her it wasn't at least....

"But how was cla- I mean, the cat nap?" she dropped her voyager into her purse on the floor by her ankles. She was reaching over to the window to slide it open, since the rain had let up a bit and they were closer to getting to the top. Once they would get to the top, there was no stopping Zuleika from getting glued to the window. Hell, she would stick her head out and everything which was why the guy saw her going on by herself, he stuck someone with her, knowing she would probably sit on top of the compartment if no one stopped her, or try scaling the thing. Seriously, people usually wondered why she just did not become a professional dare devil.

OUTFIT: click me!
TAGGED: ford martin lee

[FORD MARTIN LEE]

- - - - - - - - - -

This girl was his world, and he loved more than anyone he has ever loved before. Of course he didn't have the guts to tell her, and he was really never into relationships, although he would try anything for Zuly. He just wouldn't try everything with her. She was a daredevil, and she usually tried to drag him along to do the stuff that she did. He would love to do what she does, but he was a pansy, and would much rather stay on the ground. They still had fun together, though. Staying at his dorm, playing his PS3 or X Box 360, going to the carnival, or just walking around with each other. That was his kind of fun, besides partying, but ever since Zuly came along, he's been going to less parties.

"There's no way in hell you're dragging along to do that again." he said jokingly, smiling. There was one time when they went cliff diving; he was going to try it, but once he reached the top of the cliff he chickened out. As Zuly jumped off, he tried to go after her, but realized that he was way too close to the edge and just left her be. Though he knew she was going to be alright, he had a gut feeling that she wasn't going to be. There was no way in hell he was going to loose another one of his best friends. By the time he reached the bottom of the cliff, he was out of breath, pale, and terrified that something may have happened to her.

Of course he's pretty much done the same thing to her. When Ford drinks too much, he gets really emotional and drinks even more, but ever since he met Zuly, she won't allow him to drink alone. She's there to watch over him, to make sure he doesn't kill himself since that's what he's trying to do. He killed his three best friends, he has a reason to kill himself, and he would much rather want his death to be long and painful than short and quick. He knows he shouldn't drink because when he passes out, there's always that small chance of him never waking up again, but Zuly's always there to look after him, and that's why he loves her. She's his shoulder to cry on, his guardian angel, his life...

If she wasn't there to look after him, no one else would be. Not his mother, his sister, his father, or especially his brother, and if he hadn't made a new friend, he probably wouldn't be alive right now. She's what keeps him going, keeps his hopes up, and maybe one day he'll stop drinking just for her so they can be happy together like normal people. That's all he really wants for her, happiness, and he'll try everything to give it to her, except for cliff diving.

"It was pretty good," he laughed a bit, "But I swear to God my professor hates my guts." He really didn't care if she did or not, he usually skipped her class anyway. The only class he really ever went to was his photography class, it was the only fun one he had. Ford glanced out the window and noticed they were reaching the top, and scooted over in his seat towards the window since Zuly had already opened it. "Beautiful, huh?" he looked over at Zuly, although she probably didn't hear him since she was too fixated in looking out the window. If she had a parachute, she would probably jump. "It's amazing how stuff looks after it rains..."

Of course he wasn't just referring to the view.

- - - - - - - - - -

status done
outfit !!
music mr. gnome - rabbit

[steph]

THE VIEW WAS breathtaking but as she glanced out the window, truly looking ready to climb out even though the window was just big enough for her hips and butt to go through, Ford's words hit her multi-pierced ears and she glanced over at him and smiled sweetly,"Yea," she chuckled, locking her eyes onto his eyes before tearing them away and looking back out at the view.

She couldn't tell whether he was talking about the actual view or something else...But she made herself believe he was only talking about the view. She reached out and pulled him closer so he could see the view better right next to her. Being shy in front of him only happened if she was taking off her clothes-but she was like that with everyone...she just actually turned red around Ford. Other than that, she was never afraid to pull him closer or hug him or anything. Hell, the first time she met him she had been so hyped on a Monster drink, which he forbid her to ever drink again later on, and had actually tackle/hugged him thinking he was someone else...Lovely way to meet someone...

"I wish I had a parachute..." she whispered quietly with a pout but then chuckled, "Maybe if it wasn't slippery I'd be able to scale it..." she was mumbling to herself but then pushed the thoughts out of her head. She knew she was just bringing up topics to distract herself from the fact that she didn't know if it was right to even think of Ford the way she currently was. Kissing him was a huge no-no in the just friends rule book. She saw the movie and she knew better. All that drama to end up with one person? Pssshttt....

If it was for Ford, she knew she would do it...

But she was pretty damn sure he didn't like her that way. They acted like they were conjoined twins or siblings, and incest was just down right strange. Five million cousins fifteen times removed; that was ok. Brother and sister? GROSS!

The twenty year old gave him a sweet kiss on the cheek,"Are you busy tonight?" she asked innocently with a sweet grin. They could hang out tonight-if he wasn't busy. That would be good, right? They hadn't hung out in a while...Okay that was a lie. They hung out three days ago, but she had a few scholarship essays to write up and then work became a mess. She worked as a bartender/hostess at some fancy, uptown club/resturaunt and though the pay was good, anyone who knew Zuleika knew it wasn't enough, to the point where Zuleika's kitchen table was littered with clip outs from the want ads in magazines and newspapers. A second job plus school and her social life would really put a damper on everything. She wouldn't even have time to breathe...

Zuleika had to pay for school, school supplies, her apartment since the dorms cost way too much though she had been there her freshman year before leaving, and then she had everything else like food and clothing. This was probably why Zuly didn't have a car and traveled through public transportation. Zuleika was in debt, that much was obvious. But she was hoping with these scholarship offers she'd be able to go through school without having a debt as tall as the Big Ben. The only problem was, the majority of the scholarships wanted her to move to New York City by sometime next year because they wanted her studying in one of their universities.

She didn't know if she would be willing to leave everything behind even though living in New York City would keep her father and his 'spies' away from her.

The leggy brunette tore her eyes away from Ford's and glanced back out at the view and the people walking or driving and going on with their lives. She wondered what they would say if she were to just jump out of the window right now, whether they would scream, cry, yell in anger....she had no idea.... And she didn't want to find out. She knew Ford had gone through so much and she wouldn't want him to go through so much all over again...

OUTFIT: click me!
TAGGED: ford martin lee
STATUS: done!

[FORD MARTIN LEE]

- - - - - - - - - -

Even though he was madly in love with this girl, he never had the guts to tell her, and he always thought she didn't want to be anything but friends. He didn't have just a simple little crush on her, he was in love with her, and he knew that from the beginning; he's never had the same feeling about anyone else growing up. Actually, Zuly's the only girl he's ever felt this way about. As she locked eyes with him, he just smiled, feeling a bit nervous. He was an adult now, and he felt like he was acting so childish.

He decided that today he would finally tell her how he really felt about her. He wouldn't put it off, make it subtle, or anything like that. He was going to tell her straight up, no ifs, ands, or buts about it - he was going to do it no matter what. He allowed himself to be pulled closer to her, putting his arm around her shoulders. He pulled her closer to him as he looked out the window at the view. It really was beautiful, he really couldn't believe he had never paid so much attention to the outside while he was on the ferris wheel before. The sky was still a bit gray, and small traces of lightning shot across the sky, signs that maybe it would rain a little later. People were walking below as if no one were watching them from above; lone people, children, and couples, they all seemed oblivious to the people in the ferris wheel.

He was too caught up in looking at the sights to even notice that Zuly was mumbling to herself, and it was too quiet for him to even make out. He glanced over at Zuly, wanting so bad to just tell her at that very moment even though he knew he wouldn't. Later, though... He'd tell her later. Maybe while they were still on the ferris, or perhaps if they were out doing something else. Later was just later, it wasn't a certain time of the day.

For some reason, he always thought Zuly never liked him the way he liked her. They were like a brother and sister, too close for an actual relationship, and he hated that. Maybe something good would come of it, maybe not, but there was always that small gleam of hope that kept him wishing that it would work between the two of them one day.

He was too wrapped up in his thoughts to even expect a kiss at that very moment. His face started to turn red and he couldn't even think of an answer for her question. "Uhh.. Mm... No?" Oh how he just wanted to turn around and return that kiss, only it wouldn't be a friend kiss, it'd be one that was passionate, telling her how much loved her. I guess you could say the boy was love crazy. She was the best thing that's ever happened to him, he can admit that, and he hoped it was the same for her. Apparently he had made some impact on her life or they wouldn't be hanging out as much as they usually did, and they wouldn't be so attached at the hip.

Of course he had a job doing photography, but he only worked when he was called in, which didn't happen to often. The pay was alright, but it wasn't the best in the world. Luckily for him, he knew he didn't have to work tonight, and he would probably skip school tomorrow, so he had all the time in the world to hang out with Zuly.

- - - - - - - - - -

status done
outfit !!
music mr. gnome - rabbit

[steph]

FORD HONESTLY WAS the best thing that happened to Zuly in her life so far. She was never truly close with someone before, other than her mother, before she passed away. Losing people was something Zuleika had never gotten used to. Whether it was that one American solider, her mother, or the pet puppy her father killed when she was thirteen. Regardless of age, race, or species, Zuleika had a hard time letting things go. She could hold a grudge for years. It was just how she always had been.

She leaned her head slightly on his shoulder as the ferris wheel started coming back down again,"We should hang out. I don't know what we could do but I'm sure we'll figure it out," she chuckled as the people started looking bigger and the sky seemed to be shifted further and further away from them little by little.

Zuleika wondered if she should tell him now, about how she had been thinking about moving to New York City for a while...But she didn't know yet. It wasn't a definite. She knew if she moved, she would have to start all over again and that was far too difficult at the time being. She glanced up at him, her eyes wavering. All she had to do was lean in. That was it. Lean in and press her lips against his...

She had imagined it, once, doing the ultimate adrenaline rush activity. The ultimate ultimadum. And it was so simple: three little words, eight simple letters, so many meanings...Just to utter them to him...She could jump off a cliff, a bridge, and scale a mountain, but she can't speak three words which was as easy as using her vocal chords. Without realizing it, she found herself starting to lean in...In a way she felt like she was in a trance...

And then her phone started blaring. Pink's voice was blaring out the words to the chorus of her hit song Sober as Zuleika seemed to snap out of it and tear her eyes away, glancing down at her phone and seeing that it was work. Crap. She could have sworn she had off today...

Wait. Today was payday. The one day of the week when Zuleika really did go crazy was the day her boss handed her the pretty and fat envelope with her money and tips. She reached over into her bag and just looked at the phone for a second before finally answering, "Hey..." she sighed deeply as the male voice of her boss boomed into her ear explaining about them needing someone to cover whatserface for the night shift tomorrow. Blah. She was suppose to work the day shift... She hated working the night shift. It really was a bummer, considering it was a pain and she had a lot of night classes... Two of which she would have to miss tomorrow...

"Yeah, sure thing. No prob," she scrunched up her nose and then pretended to stick her finger down her throat as if to show she wanted to gag. Then she hung up and glanced back over at Ford with another sweet grin,"Looks like I'm missing my classes tomorrow night," she rolled her eyes playfully before the compartment stopped again, halfway down to the bottom.

Just as lightning struck and danced across the sky, Zuleika could see it reflected in his eyes. She ruffled his hair a bit as her own icy orbs wavered, "I got offered a scholarship..." it just sort of came out and she said it softly, in hopes that maybe he didn't hear her, "But they want me to study overseas."

That was when she fell quiet. It felt like a breakup, but it wasn't. The one thing that was obvious was the fact that she was contemplating leaving or not. Everyone who was friends with Zuleika couldn't see her staying in one place for too long. She was known for traveling and only staying in a place, the longest, a month or two. But she had been in college for almost two and a half years now. If she told people this information, they would say they saw it coming. She seemed a bit impatient and restless in London sometimes and this was usually only noticeable when she was working. She would get irritated quickly whenever guys would hit on her or simply give her a bigger tip because she *ahem* has a nice set of jugs and a fine lookin' ass *ahem*. She got that everywhere...But still.

Zuleika didn't want to leave Ford behind, if anyone could see it in that sense. The only reason she would leave was if he came with her...But she also had to, not only think of her safety, but his as well considering if anyone was spying on her, they now would want to hurt him in order to get to her. Maybe staying away would actually benefit him...But, to be perfectly honest, she highly doubted that.

OUTFIT: click me!
TAGGED: ford martin lee
STATUS: done!

[FORD MARTIN LEE]

- - - - - - - - - -

He couldn't keep his eye off the view, he had already fallen in love with it, and he knew he was going to be on this ferris wheel more than he normally was. It was just too beautiful to pass up; he didn't get how people could just go through life without noticing all the wonderful things that were right in front of their eyes. At least he didn't have to worry about it, the most beautiful thing in the world was right next to him, leaning against his shoulder. Ever since he met Zuly, and started drinking less, and he's noticed a lot of things that he's never noticed before - the world was a beautiful thing, and he would hate to give it up so quickly. Maybe suicide wasn't the answer, maybe he should just appreciate his friends for who they were, and hope that someday he'll see them again.

He leaned his head against her's as the ferris wheel started to slowly turn, bringing them back down to earth. "We're bound to figure it out, we can have fun doing almost anything." And that was the truth. Put these two in a room with nothing else, and they're bound to find something to do to entertain them. They were the MacGyvers of fun, able to create anything from nothing.

For some reason, Ford could tell that there was something on Zuly's mind. Maybe they were so close that they could somehow read each others' minds, or maybe it was because of something else, he just didn't know. As the ferris wheel continued to slowly turn and stop, letting people out, he pulled her a bit closer. It was nice to feel close to someone, especially if you haven't felt close to someone in a long time like Ford; he enjoyed Zuly's company, she was the first real friend he's had in over a year, and his best friend. Was it wrong to fall in love with your best friend? He'd seen movies like that, and he's been told to never do it because it never ended up right, and afterward, you're left without anything. He didn't want that.

Being too preoccupied with the view, he didn't notice that Zuly was leaning in closer to him. He's never really paid too much attention to things anyway. But when her phone rang, he jumped a bit and removed his arm from around her shoulders so she could get her phone. As she answered it, he returned back to the opposite side of the compartment, where he was sitting before he was pulled to the window. He didn't know who was on the other end, but he thought he would move away so she can have her privacy. He reached into his pocket and pulled his phone out. Four text messages, three from Nadine and one from Toby. All about his mom wanting him to call her, but Toby's was his favorite out of the four, and it put a smile on his face. 'Hey, pansy ass, mom wants you to call her.' He and his brother were never on good terms with each other.

He laughed a bit as Zuly made a gagging gesture, so he guessed it was her boss asking her to come in sometime. He didn't think it was right for her to have to work during the day then go to classes at night when she still couldn't afford her apartment and stuff. Hell, all she had to do was ask him for help, and he would ask his dad for enough money to cover half of her debt. Ford didn't have a lot of money himself, but his dad paid for pretty much everything of his since he was the main provider in the family.

When she ruffled his hair, he smiled. She was the only person that could make him smile so much, and sometimes he smiled so much around her that it hurt. She just made him so happy. "Scholarship overseas?" that was something he wasn't expecting. His heart sank with the news. If she were to take it, that meant that she would have to leave him here in London. If it was for her benefit, though, he would tell her to go without him; he would want anything for her.

After she broke her news to him, he thought he should break his to her. It was now or never, and he couldn't wait to tell her later. He didn't care if it made things awkward between them, or if it was just a one-sided thing, he would still love her. He glanced outside, they were closer to the ground than he thought, and he looked back at her, his eyes locking with her's. "Zuly..." he paused for a couple seconds, contemplating on how he should tell her. "I don't know how else to say this... But I love you, I always have." There, it was done, now he just had to wait for it to backfire.

- - - - - - - - - -

status done
outfit !!
music mr. gnome - night of the crickets

[steph]

ZULEIKA NODDED SILENTLY when he seemed to repeat what she just told him. It felt weird, as if she were on the outside looking in. She could see herself sitting there, her one hand going to the nape of her neck as the next few sentences flowed from him smoothly as if he was telling her the time of day. She could see herself bite her lower lip as she tended to do along with the hand on the neck thing whenever she was nervous or simply did not know how to react to things-so that was usually her reaction.

He loved her.

Love was a powerful word. It truly was, but she had no idea whether what she felt for him was love or not because she never felt it before. But it had to be. Or it was just a very strong liking towards him that seemed to extend a little lot further passed friendship. She locked her icy blues onto his and they wavered as if searching through him to see if he was messing with her mind or not. They never told each other they loved each other. Sure they've said it, through a text or without really thinking about it, but never the actuall word love. They usually said ily or something along those lines.

"As a friend....or...?"

And from the outside looking in, she was slapping herself across the face for just not coming out with it and telling him that she felt the same way. It was that doubt inside her, instead of a hope, that he loved her as a friend; as a sister from another mister like she loved him as her brother from another mother. But was it wrong to love your brother from another mother more than you were suppose to? All her friends told her they would make the cutest couple and that she should go for it but then they would take it back and say that if she didn't want to risk the friendship, she should just keep it platonic.

The problem with keeping it platonic was that, more than 80% of the time she didn't want to. That, in itself, didn't help her situation one bit.

"Because it would sort of suck if it was just as a friend...considering I'm really hoping it's the or..." she continued after her last question. She wasn't going to fuck this up. She wanted this to work, whatever this was. Whether they stayed as friends and tried very very hard to keep it platonic or they became more than friends...

Either way, if she took that scholarship, long distance relationships never worked out unless it was something out of a fairytale book or whatever. She let her hand drop from the nape of her neck as the compartment came to another stop. She remembered the one time they were up at the very very top and she started rocking the thing back and forth where it looked ready to flip over. He had freaked out, of course, but started laughing when she told him she didn't plan on destroying her favorite ferris wheel anytime soon.

It was strange, considering the only times they had serious conversations like this one, Ford was usually drunk and he would either get overly emotional where he would go on about every mistake he ever made in his life or he would go on about how much he should call his mother. It didn't bother Zuleika, listening to all of it as many times as he had told her, but that was the thing; he was usually drunk whenever they did speak very seriously to each other.

Maybe that was why she asked whether it was as friends or ...well...more. He could be confusing platonic friendships with a feeling out of control, destuctive, beautiful, and breath taking. Then she would have just admitted that she was hoping he loved her as more than just a friend because she loved him in that context...

And then the awkwardness that usually lead to growing apart and eventually never speaking to each other again because the same feeling weren't returned. At least, that was how the movies and books made them seem like. Truly, she was hoping that whatever this conversation turned out to be, they would still be amazingly tight like in the movie Made of Honor...

OUTFIT: click me!
TAGGED: ford martin lee
STATUS: done!

[FORD MARTIN LEE]

- - - - - - - - - -

He couldn't have just done what he thought he did. He had been meaning to tell her, but not this soon. It was just the sheer surprise of the news that she would probably be going overseas for her scholarship, so he had to tell her. The time didn't seem right, though, but it couldn't have been at a better place. They both loved the ferris wheel and the sight was wonderful. How romantic, huh? After he had told her, he looked away, but glanced back at her for a split second. He could see she was nervous, just as nervous as he was, was that a good thing? Hopefully it was, he wouldn't want this to backfire; if it did, he didn't want things to get awkward between them.

No one else had ever heard those words come from him, save for his family, but that was family love, not, well... love love. He had told Zuly he loved her plenty of times, but in a friendship kind of way, the way you tell your best friend you love them. He's said it through texts, IMs, and even in person, but he had never meant it to sound like, 'Hey, I love you, let's spend the rest of our lives together.' One small word could mean so many different things, and this kind of love was the kind where he wanted to spend all of his time with Zuly, no matter what. It may make him sound obsessive, but hey, the boy's love crazy.

For some reason, it seemed kind of weird for Ford to look at Zuly as more than his best friend. They were practically related, not by blood, though. They were so close that they seemed like they were related. Hell, some people thought they were cousins or something, which just made things even more awkward for Ford. He knew they could make it work out between them, though, they always made things work out. Sure he didn't want to risk their friendship if things didn't work out the way he wanted them to, but he had already told her he loved her. It was out in the open, he couldn't take it back.

Wait, was she serious? If he heard her right, that would mean that she liked him back, right? And that was a good thing... "It's the or... More than a friend, Zuly." He smiled and looked back to her, feeling more complete than he had ever felt before. Really, he enjoyed being friends with Zuly, but he wanted to take it that extra step. Sure it was risky, but he was willing to try it, and if things didn't work out, they would still be friends, for sure.

But still, the scholarship could screw things up between them. He looked down, thinking. Long distance relationships never worked out, they were the relationship from hell, or so he thought. He's never heard of them working out, so of course he wasn't going to go through that. If she took the scholarship overseas, he would go with her; there had to be plenty of photography jobs that he could take over there. Hell, he would probably take on two jobs just so Zuly could attend school without having a job to worry about. School wasn't really important to Ford anyway.

Awkward silence... He couldn't think of anything else to say. Plus, he was waiting for Zuly to reply to what he had said, but what she said earlier, it seemed like she liked him back. He wasn't too sure, though, so he was just gonna wait it out. The ferris wheel moved a little more then came to an abrupt stop, letting more people out. Before today, they had really never any serious conversations, and if they tried to, they couldn't act serious at all. When they were together, life was just one big joke. Maybe that's why he was trying to quit drinking, because with Zuly, his life was something, and he had fun.

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status done
outfit !!
music supertramp - take the long way home

[steph]

THE BRUNETTE SEEMED TO nod her head again as if in understanding, "Oh!" but her voice came out a tad bit surprised before it suddenly went calm again,"Well, that's pretty damn awesome...In my opinion at least. I don't know about you but I think the seriousness of this conversation just flew out the window...Because the awkwardness is sort of putting a damper on what is suppose to be a very very very happy moment for us," She was rambling, as she usually did when she was very nervous and tyring hard not to be serious. She bit her lip as if trying to bit back a smile and failing epically since she looked just about ready to burst like a balloon with too much helium.

She cleared her throat and attempted to be serious again before finally looking up at him,"Excuse me one moment..." Like she could really leave the compartment...

Instead, she seemed to go towards the window and actually start easily sliding through it so she was sitting on the sill. She glanced down. The drop was pretty far. Far enough to kill her. But she seemed to shrug it off and noticed the person in the compartment above was poking their head out the window.

"HEY! YOU UP THERE! YOU GOT A MINUTE?!" she called up as the person looked down confused,"CONGRATULATIONS! YOU'RE OFFICIALLY THE FIRST ONE TO KNOW THAT HE SAID THE OR! THE MORE AS A FRIEND THING, YA KNOW?!" the person seemed to scream down that that was pretty damn awesome. Whomever she was, she was oh so right. Zuleika chuckled,"SHOULD I DO IT?"

Obviously, she didn't say what 'it' was, but the other random person she did not know seemed to nodd and yell back down that she should before telling her goodluck, "K! THANKS!"

Finally, Zuleika climbed back in and smiled cheerfully at Ford,"No offense...But it took you long enough."

She chuckled before her hand went to the nape of his neck and pulled him in for a kiss. It felt like paradise having her lips finally locked onto his. To be honest, she thought it would never happen. She felt silly, for how she reacted, but she had to get it out somehow and that was how she did it: by yelling at the woman who was in the compartment above her's who was obviously a lot older than the two of them. But with the shared feelings finally out in the open and the kiss sealing it came one very sinking and bad feeling in the pit of her stomach.

She couldn't take that scholarship. She would have to find a way around it. It would suck, losing all that money for her education, but she couldn't leave London. Though she could be restless, she had been here so long and nothing has happened to her yet. Her father's goons haven't come after her nor have they found her so maybe this was suppose to be her safe haven? There were tons of other scholarships out in the world, this was only one scholarship she would be passing up.

But, at the moment, she pushed all those thoughts aside and just thought about what was happening. The kissing. She was kissing Ford. She thought it would be weird, considering they acted practically related, but ... instead... it felt like it fit. It was like the awkwardness from before decided to float away on a pretty little cloud and stay there...

Zuleika, for the first time in a really long time, felt like she didn't have to do something crazy to feel alive.

OUTFIT: click me!
TAGGED: ford martin lee
STATUS: done!

[FORD MARTIN LEE]

- - - - - - - - - -

It was kind of shocking to see that Zuly was much more surprised than he thought she would be. Maybe it just finally hit her and she still didn't fully get it until the last second? That didn't really matter, though, at least she knew now. It was still out in the open, she hadn't given him a definite reply yet, other than just meaningless rambling. Sure it was a very happy moment for the two of them, but the conversation went from serious to just plain awkward. He could tell she was nervous, hell, he was nervous too, but Zuly looked like she was just about to burst from holding her excitement back. He couldn't blame her, she wasn't really one to burst out with excitement anyway.

As he sat quietly on his side of the compartment, he just looked around idly, still waiting for something to happen. Excuse me.. What was that supposed to mean? What was she going to do, jump out of the compartment or something?

He almost couldn't believe his eyes when he saw her CLIMBING out of the compartment window to sit on the edge. What was she trying to do, kill herself? Ford didn't know how to react. If he tried to grab her, it might cause her slip and fall to her death or something. "God, Zuly! What're you trying to do, kill yourself?" Although after she started to yell at someone, apparently the person in the compartment above them, he thought he just ought to leave her alone so she can finish what ever the hell she was doing. Geeze, this girl was crazy, but he still loved her.

The conversation she was having with the other person just made him smile and laugh a bit. Yelling at random people while sitting on the edge of a window so high up that if you fell, you'd die - Yep, she was excited about the news. He wished he could be as excited as Zuly, but it just wasn't like him. When she crawled back into the compartment, he was about to tell her something, but the other utter shock of what she did made him lose his train of thought.

He had wanted this for the longest time, and it came so quickly that he didn't know how to react. He put both arms around her waist, pulling her closer to himself. This was something he had wanted since he met Zuly, and he knew she had wanted it too, obviously. The thought of her scholarship was still in his mind, though if she really did want to take it, he knew he would go along with her, and he would probably tell her soon, if she really was going to take it. He wouldn't let her go alone. A girl as beautiful as her overseas just screamed trouble, especially if she was going to live in a big city. He'd have to be there to protect her, to keep other people away from her. It may not seem like it, but Ford could really be intimidating.

The moment was too precious to ruin with such thoughts, so he pushed them from his mind and just focused on what was happening right now. Before this moment, he had thought about it, and it seemed like it would be weird. They were practically family, but right now, that didn't matter. It seemed right, they were perfect for each other. The clouds outside had started to clear, and the thunder and lightning had finally stopped. With the window open, there was a cool breeze pushing its way around the inside of the compartment; it was enjoyable, and more than likely it was going to rain later.

He couldn't pull himself away right now, he was enjoying himself too much - the kiss, Zuly in his arms, everything. It was perfect. Plus, if he did pull away, he wouldn't have the slightest idea of what to say.

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status done
outfit !!
music mirah - the garden